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The first time I read about alexithymia — difficulty in experiencing, expressing, and describing emotional responses — I laughed. Now they have a diagnosis for being a normal man. Then I thought about how true that diagnosis would be for me. If you know me, you know that I started my journey shut down in…
You had a plan to be in a great relationship, with a fulfilling career, and maybe a family of your own. . Where are you with that plan? Maybe your relationship is heading in the direction of previous relationships. Maybe you just don’t have one. Your work is just that – work. The plan of…
This article was first published on the Good Men Project. [clickToTweet tweet=”Men, how many times have you heard that you need to “get in touch with your emotions?”” quote=”Men, how many times have you heard that you need to “get in touch with your emotions?””] For decades, we were told that we need to become…
What is the toughest, most macho place to work? How about an oil rig? When Shell Oil decided to build the largest oil rig in history, to drill deeper than any other rig, they trained their men dig deep. For those men, digging deep meant digging into their emotions. This NPR report tells the story…
While living in Phoenix many years ago, I sat on my couch one evening with Pam, the woman I was dating. I was trying to answer her request to feel my emotions and explain my thoughts. Pam kept saying patiently, “I don’t feel you.” After a few minutes, sharing my thoughts on the subject, I…
I grew up a loser. In elementary school, with my speech impediment, dyslexia, and social incompetence I failed with consistency. One of the ways I coped was to project on to others how they were jerks. I often saw their success as not fair, setting me up to be a victim. The better others did,…
