Costa Rica Coules Retreat
The Uniqueness of Relational Coaching
I work together with Dalia Anderman, LMFT, a couple’s therapist. We share clients, teach HMT workshops, and offer couples intensives. We are committed to helping couples reconnect through their innate desire for connections. Dalia’s work with Sue Johnson, Ph.D., and my work with the somatic and trauma therapy innovators weaves together the parallel research of attachment theory and stress physiology.
For many years, we were told that if we could fix our brokenness, we would solve our problems. Well, as smart as we may be, we realize that does not work. Often, a person will feel ashamed when the problem still exists after doing all the right things.
A Broken System
The issue may still exist because the system used to change it is limited and does not heal the underlying problem.
It’s the Cycle, Not You
Dalia and I work to unpack the negative cycle relationships get into by using our natural ability to connect to our own experiences and then to the experiences of others. When we shift from chasing the symptoms or the “he-said-she-said” to the deeper emotions, the couples we work with open up. Once open, connection naturally returns.
Rebuild Attraction & Desire
When communication shifts from fights or avoidance to being together, couples feel safe, and they relax. Forgiveness, vulnerability, and attraction return. We are simple animals in the sense that when we feel safe and appreciated, we are attractive.
Change the State
It’s not that we don’t know how to connect; it’s that we don’t have the skills to get into the state that creates connection.
You Can Do It
You may believe you or your partner can’t get there. Over the years, we have had many clients who have tried other approaches and have been on the verge of giving up. Often their desire for connection eroded to simply wanting peace. But a lot more than the absence of pain is possible.
As the success of the MELD Method grows, so does the requests to experience the work and learn how to do it.
Through EVRYMAN and now MELD, I lead professional training for men and women around the MELD Method and how to work with men.
These trainings are for coaches, therapists, and psychiatrists.