What’s missing in your life? Is it the depth of friendship you had when you were younger? Is it true intimacy in your relationship? Are you missing purpose or passion in your life?
As men we work hard to achieve our goals. Yet we will often feel there should be more to life. We look around at our friends and colleagues only to see they are more or less experiencing same plight.
Therapy is out. Whining at the local bar gets old. Taking meds for depression never appealed to you. Toys, exercise and the media only offer temporary diversions from your malaise. At the end of the day something is still missing.
There is more to success
I left college, traveled, and eventually settled down in Phoenix to build my life and my career. I arrived in Phoenix in 1980 with less than a thousand dollars to my name to start a new life. My first place was an unfurnished condo that also served as my office. My first house guests were nocturnal scorpions.
Within five years of arriving in Scottsdale, I had one of the largest Rolfing practices in the country, and the beginnings of my holistic medical clinic. Over the next twelve years, my partners and I developed new businesses and led holistic health in new directions.
But in spite of my success, I was exhausted, depressed and bored. I still loved working with people, but all the other parts of my life became a burden. I was also pissed. After all the sacrifice to achieve my success, I wasn’t happy. I felt like I’d been lied to.
Yet there was no one to get mad at. Who lied to me? No one person promised me eternal happiness if I worked my ass off. Should I be mad at myself for buying into that myth?
After accepting my plight, I vowed to change it. I thought, hell I’m an entrepreneur. I can fix and create things that work. So I set out exploring my options, testing and moving on to better options. Eventually I began to realize that what was missing in my life was fun, camaraderie and other male friends. When I was younger I had friends who seemed to take the edge off of what wasn’t working; I could hang with the guys and feel a sense of togetherness, and I knew I wasn’t alone.
In all my success, in all the trappings of what was supposed to make me happy, I still felt alone. So I asked myself, how do I fix this?
What to do
After decades of working with men, my business partner Ken Solin and I decided to share what we’d learned. We want to teach other men how to shift a man’s life. Through our groups and our network—hundreds of men in their own micro-communities—we discovered a way to create a new life. These new men’s groups are down-to-earth communities of men being themselves.
Maybe it’s tapping into our ancestral history of being in tribes, or maybe it’s our need for camaraderie – whatever it is, once men allow themselves to open up to other men they have a brotherhood. All men step into this with apprehension. Yet when you speak to them after a few hours of interacting with other men, they will tell you their fears were unwarranted.
It’s funny how the biggest and bravest of us can be scared of sitting with other men. I’m not big or brave and I certainly had my concerns. We all want to connect with other men, yet we are like the shy high school boy, standing against the wall, hoping a cute girl will come and ask us to dance.
Manhood 2.0 – be your own hero
Here’s your invite to come dance…
We created Man Camp Weekends as a way for men to easily join similar men in a weekend of just being men. These weekends aren’t hangouts where we brag; they are intentional micro-communities where men get real in a safe space. They are places where men gently let down their guard to reveal themselves – to allow those places which are voids of human interaction to fill up.
In my thirty-five years of exploring all options I have yet to find a more powerful or more enjoyable way to fill the void of what is missing than a men’s group. It’s as if we find our younger versions of ourselves to pick up where we left off as kids.
Take a deep breath, and register for our next weekend in October. You will appreciate the investment and so will those close to you. Send or bring a friend and we will give you $100. Click on this link to sign up to get $100 for each person you send… take the money from us.
If you have any questions, please contact me. I hope to see you there.
photo by Thomas Leuthard via Compfight